As a side note, my sister, Debbie, got married the same day as me. Debbie and Rudy were blessed with 3 beautiful children and will be celebrating their's as well! We had individual weddings and a shared reception...LOL! That's another story I'll have to share one day. In case you couldn't tell, John and I are on the Right.
Since we are in a holding pattern, as far as when we leave to get our girls, I thought I would write about our other children. I will start with our three oldest. Jeremey, Charity, and Brandon. John and I met in Monterey, California while he was attending the Naval Post Graduate school. My father was also studying for his Masters there. I was 20, had just returned from working in Japan, and was living with my parents. John was a single father to these three precious children. John had adopted Jeremey when he was 10 months old and had married Jeremey's biological mother. Unfortunately, their marriage only lasted 3 yrs but had produced 2 more beautiful children. When Brandon was just a small baby and the marriage was over, John headed to Monterey with these three little guys in tow. Shortly after that, we met and married. I became an instant mother and was in love, not only with John, but these three wonderful children as well. From that time until now I have been the only mother they have ever known.
We immediately wanted to have more children but after several years, began to wonder why we hadn't been blessed. We were soon to find out that we would be unable to have any children of our own. This was a very difficult time for me, as anyone who has been through this knows. To make matters worse, my younger sister was pregnant and although I was happy for her, it was a constant reminder of what I was missing. We had just been relocated from Va and were staying with my parents in San Diego. My sister and her husband were there as well. One night when I was really upset, my mother suggested that I go read my bible and pray. I went upstairs, sat down by John on the bed, and opened my bible. It literally opened to:
I remember looking over at John and saying "read this." We prayed and John said, "If we ever have a little girl we will name her Faith." I was pregnant and we had the most beautiful baby girl. Her name...you guessed it... Faith. I always tell people to be careful what you pray for because you might just get it. I prayed, (more like a beg...LOL!), and asked God to please just allow me to have one child. I got it. He allowed me to give birth to one and only one. However, God in all of his glory always gives you more than you could ever dream of having. You'll see as you read on. :)
John and I both loved having children and wanted a large family but were now faced with the reality that Faith would be the only one I would have. By this time we were stationed in Panama City, Fl and my parents were in Seoul, Korea. We began talking about adoption and as God always does, had everything already in place. My mom began writing about how easy it was to adopt in Korea and how many military families had Korean children. We were due to rotate and were planning on going to DC but John called and asked if we could get a duty station in Korea. First let me say that no one asks to go to Korea. It was considered a hardship tour and was avoided by all...LOL! Needless to say, they jumped when they had a volunteer to fill that billet.
Shortly after, I packed up and headed to Seoul 3 months ahead of John. I left for a 2 day trip with 4 sick kids and 2 dogs. (That's another story in itself). I arrived, like I said 3 months before John, and stayed with my parents who I was very glad were living there. Right after I arrived I went to the Eastern Adoption Agency, (AKA EAA), and began the paperwork for us to adopt. I had everything completed by the time John arrived in country. We were now living in the Nasiah Hotel, which was where the Military put us for our temp housing. We had 2 bedrooms, LR, small fridge and sink, and 1 bath. It was pretty dumpy. I remember seeing mice run along side the base boards. Anyone that has traveled in 3rd world countries, know how nasty it can be.
We had been there for 5 weeks when the agency called and asked if we could come in. The next morning as we sat in the lobby they walked out with a little bundle. All we could see were big black eyes and curly black hair. They told us if we didn't want her that there were others that we could choose from. The emotions that I was feeling are to many to begin to describe. I asked when she was born...November 24th, my birthday! The next day which was snowy, windy, and very cold I went with my 3yr old, Faith, and my 2 yr old niece, Desiree, to pick up our new daughter, Hope. She was 2 weeks old and weighed 5lbs. She had been born premature but perfect. I unwrapped her to find the tiniest baby I had ever seen and also one of the most beautiful. I could not believe that someone was just giving me this precious little angel. I couldn't believe how God had arranged so perfectly the whole process. Her adoption was completed a few months later.
When Hope was about 8 month old we began talking about how it would be nice for her to have a sister or brother from the same country and besides I like even numbers so one more would give us our perfect family. We went to the agency and were told that they couldn't give us another baby, (we had too many kids), but if we found one that was adoptable, they would do the adoption. We were going to begin looking at orphanages for a baby when I ran into a Korean women in the exchange,(our base store). She was asking me about Hope and her adoption etc...when she asked if we wanted another baby. I said as a matter of fact we did and agreed to meet her the next day at the base cafeteria to discuss it. She said she knew of a baby that had been abandoned by her mother and her Aunt was caring for her. The Uncle didn't want to keep a child that wasn't his and they wanted to place her for adoption. I met with them the next morning and was told that her mother had been married in name only. The father had left them. The mother had left her in a crib and the grandmother found her the next day. She cared for her a few days then gave her to the Aunt. The Aunt is who I met in the cafeteria. The baby was sick and just seemed to be in shock. It was so sad. I asked if they would be able to have both parents come to EAA to sign the papers. No problem!!! At that point I was holding the baby and they began to get up and leave. I kept saying you can't go we have to meet at the agency. They just kept saying No problem...I kid you not! I was about to have a heart attack. They just left. So there I was, standing in the middle of this cafeteria in shock holding this little 8 week old baby.
John had worked 3rd shift so when I got home I woke him and said, "Meet your new daughter"...LOL!
(This picture is the one we took when I woke him up and he met Madeleine for the first time. I think we were all in shock!!)
We went to the agency and were told they couldn't do anything without signatures. We spent the next 10 months fighting to get our little Madeleine adopted. John wrote numerous letters to every Government department he could think of in both countries. We were repeatedly told to put her in an orphanage and go about it the right way. We knew if we did that we would never see her again. Our church started praying for us, first weekly, then daily, and at the end, sometimes hourly. At one point, we were called to the agency to meet Madeleine's birth parents and sign the papers. We went, saw them sign, then 2 days later were told it never happened and they were never there. We even looked at illegal ways of getting her out...I'm not kidding! We were not going home without this child. We had had her with us for 10 months and she was ours. We all continued to pray along with so, so, many people. Then, just like magic, the agency called and said we could adopt her. To this day we have no idea why! Just another one of Gods many miracles!!!
About a year later my dear husband decided to stir things up when he informed me he would like another boy. Once again, very cautiously I might add, we went to EAA. This time we were told that we couldn't adopt a healthy child but if we found one with special needs they would do the adoption. Once again we set out looking. This time for a little boy with a very minor disability. We were thinking a cleft pallet, club feet, something like that. Instead we got our beautiful Grace. Instead of rewriting everything about her adoption you can go to our 3/11 post and read about her. The pictures that follow are the ones that we took at the orphanage the day we took her home.
I am sharing these so that everyone can see the miracle that can occur with prayer and love!
Her first smile!
Years later still smiling!
What I didn't write about in that post, was that after we had had her in the hospital for over a month and she survived, they said we couldn't adopt her. They wanted to send her back. Let me explain. In 1988 the Summer Olympics were held in Seoul. They had taken all of the orphans and moved them out into the country where all the visiting foreigners wouldn't see how bad the orphanages were and how many children there were. They didn't want to risk having someone find out about Grace so they decided to just send her back...WRONG MOVE! I knew of several very popular reporters that were in Seoul and near where the base was. One was Brian Gumbel. They also didn't know that I had pictures of Grace when we had picked her up that first day. Without repeating the words that I used, (they weren't very nice), I told them to pack sand. I also told them that I expected to have all the necessary paperwork signed and in my hand with in the week or I would go public with the pictures and info I had. (I knew where the orphanages were). We had everything with in a couple of days and there were no more difficulties with her adoption.
I flew our 3 older children to their grandparents in San Francisco a couple of months later. I followed with our three youngest and John flew home on a medevac flight a month later with Grace. Our adventure with special needs had begun and would change our lives forever and for the better!
Our last three children were born in Jacksonville, Fl. John had retired from the Navy and we were living in Merritt Island, Fl. My father was teaching at a college in Jacksonville. We had mentioned to him that we might be thinking about adopting a baby but weren't sure at this point. My plate was pretty full. I was homeschooling 4 children. My niece, Desiree, was living with us and of course, Grace was a full time job as her seizures and medical condition was worsening. My father called one day and said he knew a young women, a student of his, who was wanting to give her three children up for adoption. The girls were 1 and 2. The little boy was 3. My first response was no way, but after he and John were done talking, I agreed to meet them and talk with the mother. We met the following week and all I can say is three little monkeys. God love them! They were so cute but completely wild. We left and I told John we couldn't take them, it was just too much. We met once again at John's and my dad's urging, (John was in love), and once again I said no! A few weeks later my dad called to let us know that the children were going into foster care if we didn't take them in. There was a Mormon family that was going to adopt them but they would be taken in by the state until then. I agreed that we would keep them for a few weeks. That night their birth mother brought them to our house. The two older ones were asleep and we carried them up to bed. I looked at those beautiful sleeping babies and fell in love. Our Maria, the baby, we gave her a bath and snuggled into bed with her in the middle. I knew then they would never leave. What had I been thinking to say no to such a wonderful gift from God!
I look back and think how shocking for these little guys to wake up in a strange house, with all of these strange people. The girls adjusted well but our son from day one had trouble bonding. We had them in our care for 10 months before we could have the adoption finalized. It was a difficult time not only in helping them to adjust but in the sense that once again we had children in our care but no legal rights to them. We had to completely trust in God knowing that he had brought them into our lives and he would see this through to the end.
That was 18 years ago.
Matthew 21 is now serving in the US ARMY!
And as you all know Maria 19 the youngest is in the Navy!Elizabeth 20 is Living, working, and about to begin college in Al
Now we are waiting for a travel date to EE to pick up and adopt 3 little angels that God has told us to take into our family. Although we know our lives are about to be drastically changed and in many ways become more difficult, we also know the joy that is about to be added to our lives will far out way any inconvenience brought by adopting these little gifts from God.
I look back over the years and think how perfect God's plan for our lives has been. Had John not chosen to step up and take the responsibly of his 3 small children, had God not blessed us with a miracle named Faith, had he not sent us to Korea to meet our 3 little girls. had he not sent a women who needed help to my dad, then not only would we have missed the joy and at times hardships of raising 10 children, we would have missed this. The absolute joy and privilege of being the grandparents to these beautiful babies!
Then!
Now!
Now!!!
Then!
Now!
Then!
Now!!
I sometimes look at photo's of our family and although far from perfect they are so amazing to me, and I feel pure joy! I can't believe that God trusted us with the responsibility of rearing these children. I know that John and I have made many mistakes through the years and wish we could go back and do a better job. However, I also know that God doesn't want us to look back with regret but move forward with hope trusting that he will cover our mistakes!
You are rich in the true sense of the word. Beautiful family.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I say that every day. I am truly a blessed women!
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